squirrel toes and wining

don't panic! we are alive! it's just that everything has been so busy that we have not had time to write on here. i have been forced to eat more cake than usual and do more chores. with that and all the sleeping us pandas need to do, that leaves little time for anything else.


its also time for ludicrusmas or something something with lots of chocolate, a baby, a gorilla, an unstable (animal? zippy?), some wise camels and sprouts. lewis said he would tell me more about it. at the moment, though, he is in the other room singing with sir richard cliff about squirrel toes and wine or something.


perhaps we should sit by the fire, like we did yesterday. lewis can tell me the story about the baby panda, whilst i eat a pie of mince (not the meat stuff because i am a vegetarian) and sip some yummy cream (yum yum)



yes, i think i'll go and find him...

see you soon! lots of love and sprouting cakes

love from nora xxx

Made Up

Just in case you were worrying about me. No need! I am feeling fine now and have even had time to not only drum with Sniff of the Yard (remember our band - the Monkey LaLas), but also to have a go on other instruments too!

The guitar it a bit tricky and I have noticed that my singing has caused some of the animals in the Fluffy-Hair House to move into another room - some even holding their ears! One of them told me that they need to cover their ears as it is getting colder. I think I shall have to investigate the matter further.

Anyway. I hope you will also be pleased to hear that Riley (of all animals!) has helped Nora and myself discuss our differences over the cleaning issues. Initially the conversation did not go too well as you can see.

However, we have now all reached an agreement regarding the chores, so all is well in the Fluffy-Hair House.

I'm off now to make a banana milkshake. I shall be sharing this with Nora, and she will be doing the washing up.

Compromise.

Lewis the Gorilla xx

chills and chores

oh dear me. lewis is not well. he wasn't too happy about me taking this photo, as you can see, as he was concerned that he had not gone through his daily grooming ritual and would not look his best. i think he should be more concerned about how silly that thing on his nose looks.




apparently it is not a plaster, he has not been punched on the nose, he has not fallen over and hit his head on a leg of furniture. oh no. apparently it helps him breathe better! i just might have to test it out later as it all sounds like codswallop to me (ooops, sorry fish... nearly forgot the CALF).

anyway. it does mean that i have been FORCED into having to do the chores. what with lewis being on strike AND being ill. it took me a long time because things had piled up, but i got it finished.

riley very kindly gave me a big slice of cake as a reward, which i'm off to finish now...

nora the panda x

panda dreams

its not fair. lewis is on strike (still). AND simon the sloth and the monkey went away (AGAIN).

anyway, they have given me some cake for putting their photos on here, so that's a good deal (or no deal). but i want to go away. i shall have to have a long think about where i want to go (while sitting in the bath, supping tea, eating cake and dreaming of a pink fluffy dress)...

righty ho. cake all gone. now, where did i hide those toffees?

lots of love and fluffy holiday thoughts, nora xxx (on the veranda panda)

Garden Gaiety then Gloom

I'm having a break. Nora is downstairs (being lazy and watching TV) and I'm annoyed with her. The vegetables have all gone for a drink to the salad bar, and the Blue Footed Boobie is having his lunch.

We've been out in the garden. It was great! But the grass was long (even Dolly couldn't nibble it all up). So, I thought we had better go and do some gardening. It was very hard work.

Nora, as you can see, threw down the gloves and decided to go for a kip on Dolly. She is so lazy.

I worked very hard (stopping only briefly for a chat with Gordon the Gnome).

He was guarding the potatoes. Apparently they make good detectives (like me), because they keep their eyes peeled. A lesson for us all there. Nora, on the other hand, had her eyes closed.

So, I'm having a banana break (or slice). I think I might go on strike next week (and join the post men). I wish some of the other animals in the Fluffy-hair house would actually help with the chores.

Lewis (on strike from NOW) :-(

sleep

oh dear. its been pandamonium. or was that immodium? i can't remember. anyway. i didn't sleep for days (well, nights) as i was scared about making a mess in the bed. but then i did get to sleep (and did not make a mess). i slept so hard that i must have walked in my sleep, as i woke up in a very strange house.

i found some chocolate, but it turned out to be a brown candle.

luckily there was a door in the door, so i managed to get out without anyone noticing.

apparently, all the animals in the fluffy-hair house were worried about me. they looked everywhere - the fridge, the cupboards, the biscuit tin, under the rug, even out in the bins! but could not find me.

luckily for me, lewis used his detective skills and managed to spot some of my paw prints and found a trail of rice crispies. so he followed the trail of crisp-rice and found me!

i hadn't gone far. thanks to lewis, i am safely back in the fluffy-hair house. i am now sleeping every night, helped by a mug of hot chocolate (yummy).

everybody poos.

take comfort in your friends.

everybody poos,

sometimes

(domesticated) nora xx (no poo when asleep here)

Poo

Well. Its been a bit of a poo day today. First of all, the card-camera-photo-sticky-thing broke, so you will have to wait a while to see us again. Then Nora was sent an 'anonymous' email accusing her of pooing in her sleep! This 'anonymous' fluffy creature had heard that's what pandas do when asleep! This email possibly originated from a tiger with a grudge. I shall use my detective skills to find out more...

Anyway. Nora is refusing to go to bed, just in case she makes a mess in the middle of the night. I've told her not to be so silly, and that all will be well. I too, have been tarred with the poo brush of lies - obviously not literally. Apparently, gorillas eat their own poo! But I don't. And it upsets me to think that others think I would! Perhaps we should all take a leaf out of Simon the Sloth's book (tree) and just go once a week in the same spot.

Lewis (not poo-is)

vegging

aaah. the timeless wonder of the english countryside (i don't know what that means, but lewis has been saying it all day).

we've been vegging out in the sun today in a grass chair (no decking here) as you can see. some vegetables were also vegging out (i think they had escaped from the composter). after my accident, i have decided not to wear my glasses of sunshine for a while, so i just have to keep my eyes closed tight shut. lewis was pretending to be intellectual again by reading a paper of news. this was actually lots of pieces of paper with not much news, but there were some pictures of some nice dresses i wouldn't mind having. anyway, i just popped in to get some biscuits and a lemon drink, so off out again now. oh, i can hear lewis shouting that i should tell you the he and sniff of the yard solved the mystery of the horse that bolted. he was after some apples apparently and didn't want any water, so had only popped to the next field.

sunny sunshine and vegetable vegging to you all

love and fluffy flowers, nora x

Nuts and Bolts and Horsing Around

Well, we've had a very busy time. First of all the Monkey disappeared (Nora seemed more concerned that her new sun glasses had disappeared at the same time). He had apparently been sunning it up on holiday, as you can see.

Then the banks had another holiday, so we had to put our money under the mattress again. There was quite a lot of it this time because Riley, it turns out, has become quite rich from all his chat-show-hosting.

Then, after the banks finished their holiday, the Monkey returned (he'd apparently been practising for a trip he's going on soon to Spain). Nora was so pleased to see the Monkey return with her glasses of sunshine, that she insisted on wearing them all the time, even in the dark. Unfortunately, one evening last week, she had a bit of an accident (horsing around).

As you can see from one of the videos in the house (that Riley swears he did not put up as a hidden camera), she walked into the stone fire place! Ouch!

Well, we had to rush her straight to the fluffy-hospital! But we had to wait when we got there because a horse feeling a bit horse.

Don't worry, he's OK now. When we asked him what happened he said it was like nuts and bolts. He said his rider was nuts, so he bolted! Oh dear!

Nora is OK too, although she has a couple of black eyes (you can't really tell, though, as she already had black eyes) and she did have night mares for a while (about horses). Anyway, she's been getting a lot of sympathy and insists that strawberries are good to help heal bruises.

Not sure about that. Anyway. All is calm now. No more hospital visits, bolting horses or mattress capers.

All this has distracted me from my detective work, which I shall return to. Had better go now, as I have a meeting with Sniff of the Yard to discuss an recent incident of a horse that bolted. Apparently, someone tried to lead him to water and make him drink. This may turn into a case where my detective skills are needed... we'll see.

Lewis x

Fame!

Well. Wouldn't you know it (well, you will now, unless you have very poor memory issues). It turns out that Riley (who, we have found is the world's biggest chatterbox) is actually a TV chat show host! He's taking a "career break," and has now moved in with us! I hope he hasn't hidden any cameras in the Fluffy-Hair house to do some kind of "reality" (lack of sanity, more like) programme. He's been showing us videos of him on TV, as you can see.

He has interviewed a few fluffy celebs; such as Roland Rat, Hartley the Hare, Barbara Woodhouse and her dogs (sss-it), Beethoven (the dog, not the composer, as he died a long time before Riley was born), Zippy, (get down) Shep, Shaun the Sheep and Professor Yaffle the carved wooden bookend (apparently he tried to interview Bagpuss, but he was asleep, so the Professor stepped in at the last moment). We cannot tell whether Zippy (who lives here in the Fluffy-Hair house) can remember Riley, as Zippy, unfortunately, has gone a bit crackers (no malice intended towards savory biscuits).

Anyway, he showed us his book of interview questions. I shall borrow some of them for my detective work. He's getting on well with everyone in the Fluffy-Hair house, although sometimes I wish he would talk a little less. Oh well. He does have some very interesting stories to tell.

Lewis xx

glasses of sunshine

yippee! yippee! a rhino called riley has just knocked on the fluffyhair door and given me a new pair of sunny glasses! just like that!

apparently, he was told by a sheep that i had lost my sunshine glasses!

they look really good, don't you think? what a nice rhino! had better go as i'm making him a cup of tea to say thank you. now, where did i hide those scones?...

nora with new pink glasses - yippee! x

Lemurs and Bees

My friend the Lemur came down to the Fluffy-Hair house for a few days.

It was great! We were able to jam (my drumming has got better, you will be pleased to hear) and then eat jam (scones)! Nora, of course, was very happy about the scones.

The weather was so good that we played hide and seek in the garden.

Yoda decided not to play, but to just sit an be. And talking of bees, Simon found a lot of them bee-hind the bush we were in. We told them to buzz off, and they did! Obviously, they were very well bee-haved!

With all this going on, I have not had time to use my detective skills to look for the sunglasses that Nora lost. Oh well. She will have to go without.

Off now to listen to the Bee Gees!

Oh, hang on, someone is knocking at the Fluffy-Hair door...

Lewis x

dolly

its been a crazy week - pandemonium! as lewis told you, the fluffy-hair house has moved! (i think he explained that the house was not put onto a lorry, as i first thought, but that we are now actually in a different house. and i know my bottom is a bit big, but it is not the size of a lorry and i do not look like the back of a bus).

anyway, dolly the sheep missed us so much that she has decided to come and live with us! here we are, playing in the garden. it was a hot day today, so we (i) needed to eat lots of cake to give us (me) energy.

i think we look cool in our sunny glasses. lewis won't be happy with me because i have now lost my glasses of sunshine, but i suppose i look like i am wearing them anyway because of my black eyes, so maybe he won't notice.

time to go! i can hear simon calling me (maybe he has found my sunny eyes) xx

Fluffy Hair Cut

We thought something was up when we were given lots of chocolate. Given it! Just like that! No need to pop to the shop, or for Nora to raid the fridge. And not just ordinary chocolate, oh no, but banana chocolate. Something for me and Nora to share (as you can see, it even had my picture on the front - a very special bar of chocolate).

Unfortunately, Nora disappeared with most of it when I momentarily turned around to wave at Sniff of the Yard (the dog next door) walking past the window.

But anyway. These treats continued... Not only the banana chocolate, but the Monkey and I were also treated to a trip to see some fellow primates!

Apparently Nora was out having a treat somewhere too (not sure where, but when she came back her paws were all sticky).

The reason for all this was to be told that the Fluffy Hair house was moving! I don't mean that the Fluffy Hair house is actually a mobile home and would be put on the back of a big lorry and diven somewhere else with a car in front driving very slowly saying "wide load" (not Nora's bottom!)... But, that we had to pack a case and move to another Fluffy Hair house!

Unfortunately, the case turned out to be a box. And packing a case actually meant being packed into a box (which I'm sure is illegal - will have to consult my detective books). Things all got a bit messy and squashed. Nora, as you can see, was not very happy about Senor Raimi the Llama screaming in her ear! But we made it! Nobody got hurt (although Simon was sad about leaving the trees he climbs, and were were all sad to say goodbye to the sheep). At least we can still go to talk to the sheep, it'll just be a longer walk. And Sniff of the Yard said he would pop around soon.

So, here we are in the new Fluffy Hair house! This evening, all was calm, so we settled down with one of our favourite books (although I do admit that the title does not really do a lot for CALF and other animal rights).

So, as you can see, we've had a very busy week!

Lewis x

Hungry

I am celebrating this evening! For I have won the Fluffy One! (Yes, one of my many talents is racing cars). I'm now feeling hungry after being in Hungary (ha ha) so off to eat another banana.



I expect my rival is not too chuffed!







Lewis xxx

weekend away

simon and the monkey keep hassling me about 'posting' some photos of their weekend away (this has nothing to do with the postman who comes along to the fluffy-hair house). anyway. i said i would help after watching holby city (which is good for my nursing skills). so here it is. they went to the city (not holby) to meet up with senorita - a sloth friend who simon used to live with in costa rica.


don't they look like twins!

they went to the grey-hair house to speak to golden brown or something something (to talk about CALF) but he wasn't there. so they went to speak with the queen instead. and it appears they even had tea with the queen (although they said she didn't say much)!

apparently she gave the monkey some carrot cake. i was not happy that he did not bring any back for me.

they also met a dog in a coventry garden or something something.

i think i should go with them next time because that carrot cake looked great! simon has been a bit sad since he came back because senorita is moving to canada which is a very long way from here.

so simon and monkey, i hope you are happy about these photos. you owe me one (carrot cake)

nora x (on behalf of the sloth and the monkey)

Snorkelling, Reading and Knitting!

We were awoken by the sheep baaaing loudly this morning, so decided to take advantage of the whole day - even Nora managed to get up early. As you can see, I put on my snorkelling gear, ready for a trip to the sea. I know it looks a bit odd as I am sitting on top of a toilet seat, but we keep our snorkelling gear in the bathroom as we sometimes practice our snorkelling skills in the bath.

Unfortunately, by the time we got to leave, it was raining really hard. Some call that raining "cats and dogs" but this is obviously a ludicrous falsehood (keep up the CALF!). So we had to stay inside instead.

I thought it was about time I caught up with the current research in detective work, and Nora wanted to have a go a knitting a jumper. Unfortunately she got in a bit of a muddle. Even Simon was unable to help, and he has handy toes (or toey hands) that could be good for fiddly things like knitting.

So that was our day really. Hope you all had a good one. We'll try snorkelling again tomorrow. I need to thank the turtles for the jumper they gave us.

Bye for now! Love from Lewis x

On Official Business (sounds like "A Fishing Business")

We heard on the news yesterday that there had been a fight at the chip shop - apparently, some fish got battered. Being a detective, I wanted to investigate this incident further. I found it to be codswallop. But then, as Chubby pointed out to me, saying "codswallop" was not nice and may lead to more cod being battered. This led me to thinking about our CALF campaign. It's not just the fluffy-hair brigade that ludicrous falsehoods affect. Oh no! Indeed our scaled friends and others that live in the water get a raw deal (especially sushi). Some humans say "you old trout" - this is silly as trout never really get much older than 4 or so years. We've also heard humans say "fish wife," which is not a nice thing to say to anybody and I'm sure that happily married fish are not pleased when they hear it! So I sent Simon and the Monkey off to spread the CALF message to our friends in the sea. Simon came back with some photos:


On the way they met some cows (and calves!) and told them about our campaign. When they got to the sea they spoke to the fish.



They were really happy when they came back - seems like they had a whale of a time! They even got some milk from the cows and a turtle-neck jumper from the turtles!

You may be wondering why I didn't go with them. Well, Sniff of the Yard (the dog next door) hired me (again) to sort out his sausage tree. Its all sorted now. We even had time to jam together afterwards (Nora, before you get excited, this does not mean strawberry jam, raspberry jam or even blackcurrant jam. No. I was drumming and Sniff of the Yard was playing keyboards).

Anyway. We all got back after a day of hard work, only to find that Nora had eaten all the cakes! She really takes the biscuit sometimes.

Long live CALF!

Lewis x

let them (me) eat cake!

when i woke up today, none of the animals in the fluffy-hair house were in! i was a bit worried (not for too long) so i went to try and find them. of course, the first place i looked was the fridge. and guess what i found? yippee! cakes! then they came back and simon was not happy because i had eaten all the jenny eclairs. lewis said he would write and tell you later about what they did. he was a bit annoyed that i didn't help them and said i really "take the biscuit". but no-one woke me up, and i only took cakes and not biscuits, so what was i supposed to do?

nora - the icing on the cake - xx

Wave to the Heat!

Don't Panic! We are not about to jump. We have not shifted our CALF protest to an extreme measure (yet). Oh no. We are simply taking advantage of the wave of heat to get dry.

Yes, it's that time of year again! Our annual wash. We don't want you to think we only wash once a year (as Queen Elizabeth 1st did) - of course we are able to wash ourselves, as mammals can (not sure about skunks, though). No, its our annual 'deep clean' in the washing machine. Its OK though. We quite enjoy it. Gets a bit scarey if the snorkel and mask start to slide off, but on a 'handwash' cycle (although we have never encountered any hands, other than our own) its very gentle - like being at a water park (NB. this is vastly different to a car park, in many ways).

So here we are - all fluffy and new. Sun and wind bathing. Lovely. Yet again we tried to encourage Chubby to join us. After her chickhood trauma, she declined. You see, when Chubby was very young, she too was given a deep clean. All went well (athough she felt dizzy) until she was put out to dry. It wasn't in a relaxing way like we are. Oh no. For indeed it was winter time. So she was put on the fire guard. Unfortunately, the fire guard did not do a very good job of guarding the fire. Pleasant smells of fabric conditoner turned into smells of burnt chicken. You don't want to know what happened next. But surfice it to say, that Chubby has a permanent scar on her bottom, from what has been known as the "spin and burn" incident. Eversince then, she has been a worried little chicken. Its truely traumatised her. Bless her fluffy heart.

Anyway, we shall leave you now as its getting a bit cold, so I think we need to close the window.

Lots of love, Lewis (and Nora) x
keep up the CALF!

C.A.L.F.

We were all in the garden yesterday, having a picnic. It was great! Nora had her carrot cake, I had my bananas and Chubby and some of the others joined in, sharing a vast array of cheesy wotsits, hundreds and thousands (Emu counted 111) and nutty butters (? or butter nut something). Anyway, we heard a human shouting after their "pet" (imprisoned) dog, saying "stop badgering me!" This was ludicrous! - it was obviously a dog and not a badger and it wasn't a very nice thing to say. And then we were talking about all the times we hear humans say ludicrous and false things about us animals. You've probably heard them... things like "you chicken" to those that are a bit scared (this obviously upset Chubby, who is actually a chicken in both ways), "you old goat" (fine if you are an elderly goat, but not if you are an old granny walking down the street minding your own business), "silly cow" (actually cows are quite sensible), "fat pig" (not all pigs are fat - I've seen them working out), and "as sick as a parrot" (the parrots I have met in other countries are not sick. If they are, they might go to a vet and get better). Anyway, the list is endless. So we decided to form an organisation to campaign aganst these ludicrous falsehoods.


So here I am. If you want to join, just let me know! I hope humans will take this seriously and stop to think about animal feelings.

Nora, as usual, got a bit confused. But at least her heart is in the right place.

As (handy bendy) Gandhi once said: "A nation's progress can be judged by how they treat their animals"

A pause (paws) for thought, I think.

Love Lewis x