Wave to the Heat!

Don't Panic! We are not about to jump. We have not shifted our CALF protest to an extreme measure (yet). Oh no. We are simply taking advantage of the wave of heat to get dry.

Yes, it's that time of year again! Our annual wash. We don't want you to think we only wash once a year (as Queen Elizabeth 1st did) - of course we are able to wash ourselves, as mammals can (not sure about skunks, though). No, its our annual 'deep clean' in the washing machine. Its OK though. We quite enjoy it. Gets a bit scarey if the snorkel and mask start to slide off, but on a 'handwash' cycle (although we have never encountered any hands, other than our own) its very gentle - like being at a water park (NB. this is vastly different to a car park, in many ways).

So here we are - all fluffy and new. Sun and wind bathing. Lovely. Yet again we tried to encourage Chubby to join us. After her chickhood trauma, she declined. You see, when Chubby was very young, she too was given a deep clean. All went well (athough she felt dizzy) until she was put out to dry. It wasn't in a relaxing way like we are. Oh no. For indeed it was winter time. So she was put on the fire guard. Unfortunately, the fire guard did not do a very good job of guarding the fire. Pleasant smells of fabric conditoner turned into smells of burnt chicken. You don't want to know what happened next. But surfice it to say, that Chubby has a permanent scar on her bottom, from what has been known as the "spin and burn" incident. Eversince then, she has been a worried little chicken. Its truely traumatised her. Bless her fluffy heart.

Anyway, we shall leave you now as its getting a bit cold, so I think we need to close the window.

Lots of love, Lewis (and Nora) x
keep up the CALF!

C.A.L.F.

We were all in the garden yesterday, having a picnic. It was great! Nora had her carrot cake, I had my bananas and Chubby and some of the others joined in, sharing a vast array of cheesy wotsits, hundreds and thousands (Emu counted 111) and nutty butters (? or butter nut something). Anyway, we heard a human shouting after their "pet" (imprisoned) dog, saying "stop badgering me!" This was ludicrous! - it was obviously a dog and not a badger and it wasn't a very nice thing to say. And then we were talking about all the times we hear humans say ludicrous and false things about us animals. You've probably heard them... things like "you chicken" to those that are a bit scared (this obviously upset Chubby, who is actually a chicken in both ways), "you old goat" (fine if you are an elderly goat, but not if you are an old granny walking down the street minding your own business), "silly cow" (actually cows are quite sensible), "fat pig" (not all pigs are fat - I've seen them working out), and "as sick as a parrot" (the parrots I have met in other countries are not sick. If they are, they might go to a vet and get better). Anyway, the list is endless. So we decided to form an organisation to campaign aganst these ludicrous falsehoods.


So here I am. If you want to join, just let me know! I hope humans will take this seriously and stop to think about animal feelings.

Nora, as usual, got a bit confused. But at least her heart is in the right place.

As (handy bendy) Gandhi once said: "A nation's progress can be judged by how they treat their animals"

A pause (paws) for thought, I think.

Love Lewis x

messing about in the garden

we went climbing today (to get a better view of the sheep), me and simon. simon, being a sloth, was much better than me. my large bottom sometimes stops me so that i am forced to sit still for a while and have a nap. luckily i had some cake crumbs behind my ear, so it was just like being on a picnic!

although simon usually does his weekly poo on a monday, he did it today instead (for some reason, Chubby took a photo of him, which i thought was a bit rude), in his usual spot.


lewis said because he was a day late that meant he was out of sink or something something. i don't know what lewis was on about. there are no sinks in the garden and at night we sleep in a bed, not in a sink. he even told me i spelt it wrong - he said it is spelled, "sync." that is ridiculous! (sweet yummy nibbly crumbs! thats what i say!)

although chubby was in the garden, she didn't go climbing with us. she gets a bit scared about things. apparently she had a trauma as a young chick. but more on that another time (lewis knows more about it). i don't really know what a trauma is. sounds like a curry to me, and i can't imagine chubby eating a korma. she likes burgers and chips (that might be why she is chubby)

anyway, i'm off now. we love sunshine!

nora x

Swanning Around

Crikey! I've been so busy: practicing my drumming, looking for lost sheep, being hired by the dog next door - Sniff of the yard - to do some detective work (lost sausages - eventually found hanging from branch in the sausage tree), and watching myself on TV (Inspector Morse's 'helper').

So sorry if you've missed me. Indeed, I'm only on here for a few minutes as it'll soon be time for my banana-break. Nora thinks that sounds silly, because a banana doesn't break, it just gets a bit mushy and mashed (not quite like a potato though). Nora sometimes gets confused that some words can mean two different things.

Anyway, we have a baby swan staying with us, called Willam. Chubby has been looking after him as you can see. He's a bit noisey, especially when Mr Raimi the llama starts screaming and Zippy gets more mad (he's in the other photo - when it's quiet, he'll suddenly shout out "Where's Jeffrey?") . And then if I play the drums at the same time it sounds louder than an airport (I should know, I've been to a few. Don't like it though - especially when travelling home again as my face can sometimes be pushed up against the clothes that need washing - yucky yuck).

Anyway. Banana becons. See you soon! Love Lewis x